In the fringe (and sometimes mainstream) Christian world are theorists who mangle the Bible in order to sell books about topics they find more interesting, such as UFOs, aliens, money, social justice, and fame. In this series I look at some of these men, examine their beliefs, and try to figure out their motivation.
12. In Lucifer’s Light For $ale: Prowling for the Colour Green, having researched various prophecy “experts” for the previous 2 videos, I found they all seem to hold in high regard the late Chuck Missler, so I take a quick look at Missler’s life and crimes (fraud and plagiarism), and focus specifically on his interpretation of Proverbs 25:2 which he uses as a legitimisation tool to present his various secrets and mysteries that he thinks sheds light on the Bible. However a bit of looking around the labyrinthine oubliette his beliefs got him into—which his YouTube devotees followed him into and now hawk their wares from—I find that the oubliette is boa-constricting and serpentine, and seems to echo a familiar voice from the distant past that promised a similar giving of light to a curious/gullible mankind.
11. In 9 Rolls of Tinfoil from Outer-Space, I discover how Ed Wood Jr. would find his story-telling skills have been passed on, not to Hollywood B-movie writers, but to a whole host of “prophecy watchers” and self-declared “experts” in researching conspiracy theories, UFOs, and politics, to foist on the Christian world the type of pulp fiction bunk crap that would sell out 1950s movie theatres in Nevada. This video looks at the likes of Gary Stearman, Bob Ulrich, L.A. Marzulli, Tom Horn, Tim Alberino, Bill Koenig, Bob Maginnis, Joel Richardson, Bill Salus, Tommy Ice, Carl Teichrib, and Derek Gilbert, who have between them produced such ridiculous crap as the belief the Vatican is looking for the Messiah to arrive via UFO, and Mayan feathered serpent deity Quetzalcoatl was going to manifest on 21st December 2012 in a temple and would require battling.
Along the way they accidentally let slip their method of allowing naive Christians to see things that aren’t there: 3D glasses of sight-alteration via fool beliefs.
It is a tragedy that these guys can produce such bilge and find an audience inside of Christendom to lap it up, when Christians are supposed to be the world’s best thinkers and reasoners. If the above authors/filmmakers have their output accepted, it demonstrates that in the Christian world there are unfortunately a lot of gullible, slack-jawed imbeciles.
10. In Tinfoil Panic! L.A. Marzulli & the Supernatural Deep Sea Cucumber Men, Marzulli the fringe prophecy watcher who presents a YouTube bi-weekly series, explains for his audience the inner workings of “politics, prophecy and the supernatural”. I take a look at one of his shows to work out whether he has the ability to handle those 3 things, and immediately find there is a panic brewing and rebellion afoot against the government and against God, whilst around every corner lurk mysterious men conspiring, CGI aliens, and mysterious “supernatural” men dressed as deep sea cucumbers.
9. “Prophet” Kent ‘Nuclear’ Christmas was at Rock Church, Virginia, on 2nd January 2020 and gave a prophecy which was a 16-minute quote directly from ‘God‘. I listen and take a look at some of the strange views ‘God‘ seems to have, such as his fury at satellite churches not long since saying he liked them, his determination to diminish the appeal of sports (after the failure of his promise to “bankrupt” the NFL in 2018), his desire to effectively nuke Hollywood, and his desire to “destroy” Democrat politicians on Haman’s gallows(!!). In it all it seems ‘God‘ is stuck in the fog of simplistic thinking, suggesting it juuuuust might not be God speaking after all, but rather a simpleton with a seasonal surname venting at the things he personally doesn’t like, but all the same knows what hooks work on his audience, telling them God’s going to magically cause a divine reversal of fortunes by taking money from Capitalists and give it to debt-ridden lazy spongers in Virginia. Keep dreamin’ Duke Nukem!
8. After a couple of years since my last critique on him, I return to catch up on self-proclaimed “prophet” Manasseh Jordan and his dad, the similarly self-proclaimed “master prophet” E. Bernard Jordan, to find the former has been slapped with at least 15 lawsuits, leaving the latter scrounging off of 6.66k stupid people. A bit of an unforseen end for a family of “prophets” who according to themselves seem so easily to hear the future from God, and gad around with that pillar of the phophetic, Benny Hinn! It’s ‘almost’ as if they weren’t quite what their plastic film sets had painted them as being!
To register a complaint about Manasseh Jordan’s nuisance calls (illegal ‘robocalls‘) to you (which, if they were unsolicited, can now cost Manasseh $500-$1000 per call) speak to the Federal Trade Commission at ftc.gov as recommended in the ABC Action news report seen inside the above video. That excellent exposé by ABC can be watched separately here: m.youtube.com/watch?v=u_ksJgrG89E
7. Manasseh Jordan has arisen out of Benny Hinn’s ‘crusades‘ and now performs the same ridiculous farce of shoving people over in churches and caterwauling. Whereas Hinn’s followers are predominantly white, Jordan’s are predominantly African-American.
In this video Jordan claims there is a form of prosperity called “now prosperity” and demonstrates an almost unparalleled mishandling of the Bible, all the while feeling “anointed” by God:
6. This is a critique of the teaching contained in the now otherwise lost segment of Andy Stanley’s sermon “When Gracie Met Truthy” wherein he tells a story about an immoral couple in his church. It is baffling yet explains in large measure why so many people go to his church(es):
5. Perry Stone is a modern day John Brinkley, entertaining people with song and dance, then selling something utterly useless and damaging. In this teaching he misreads Scripture to force a farcical conclusion that whatever you give to God monetarily will be doubled by God in return. The people whoop and holler in appreciation of hearing this simple method of gaining the thing they worship: money.
The video deals with the various aspects of manipulation employed to con stupid people out of money.
4. A look at the life and prophecies of South African televangelist Kim Clement, specifically ones about Katy Perry, Earthquakes in Japan, and Robert Mugabe, and his farcical shoehorning of his vague or wrong predictions Nostradamus style to fit actual events as a means to take credit for predicting them:
3. Coming To You From a City Far Away: The Quack, The Boy, & The Internet Age
Fledgling societies with unskilled persons taking the strain of leadership positions with the pioneering populations prone to have their heads turned: this was a breeding ground for quacks and religious charlatans to make a killing. This video compares that milieu of the likes of fraud and supreme quack John Brinkley and his fake medicine with the eerily similar milieu of present-day religious charlatan Jacob Prasch with his fake spiritual medicine of Midrash, and “The Boy” both men used to convince their audiences.
You can read about John Brinkley in an excellent book by Pope Brock titled ‘Charlatan’ http://www.popebrock.com/charlatan/
And of course you can find out too much about Jacob Prasch on this here website.
2. The Uprooted of Stratum Heights: The Rebellion of the Purged in Secular Society and Church Society
There are an awful lot of “Bible teachers” who use the internet as their platform instead of a church pulpit. Once you dig deeper it’s amazing to find how many of them seem to dislike the actual church especially in regards to its levels of authority, and that’s partly why they set themselves up as lone wolves speaking to people who seem to have the same issues. So I take a look at the comparisons between the way rebels are treated in society and the way they are treated by church by taking into account the way God created and gave laws to both for the benefit of all, and all of this to conclude how such rebel anti-church Bible teachers should be viewed by church-goers like myself.
1. The Fog of Misfitville & The Churchless Rebellious Weirdo Prophecy Teachers
In light of the abundance of “prophecy update” videos churned out by churchless weirdos (aka self-proclaimed Bible “experts“) on YouTube, I thought I’d take a look at what causes them to appear on the scene, and why the vast majority of their internet followers exhibit signs of madness when they gather on social media and try to compute events like the Coronavirus pandemic.